Rabbi Chaya Bender President
Rabbi Chaya Bender joined B’nai Israel Congregation in 2020. She previously served Temple Sholom in Greenwich, CT as Assistant Rabbi and Youth Director from 2016-2020. She has almost 20 years’ experience in Jewish education and is passionate about helping individuals chart their unique Jewish path. Through innovative programming, classes, services and one-on-one conversations she emphasizes positive Jewish identity formation for all.
Despite the unprecedented challenges of the pandemic, Rabbi Bender reinvigorated synagogue offerings for all ages and cultivated intergenerational community building. She introduced programming for young families, rebuilt the religious school, and brought in world-class visiting scholars and musicians for adult education.
Rabbi Bender is committed to fostering inclusivity and equity. She was part of the inaugural cohort of Rimonim for Rabbis, a collaborative effort of the Rabbinical Assembly and USCJ to examine Interfaith inclusion within Conservative Synagogues. She also engages with the greater community by preaching at local town events and houses of worship.
Rabbi Bender was born and raised in Southern New Jersey. She earned a BA in Anthropology with two minors in Near Eastern, Judaic Studies and Gender Studies from Brandeis University. She received Rabbinic Ordination and an MA in Jewish Education from the Jewish Theological Seminary.
She, along with her wife, Emily Jaeger, daughter, Shlomtzion, and dog, Isaiah, love being a part of the Bnai Israel Congregation Family and the greater Wilmington Area Interfaith Family.
Rev. Gayle Tabor Vice-President
Rev. Anne Abdy Secretary
Anne spent her formative years growing up in Southern Africa (Namibia and South Africa) and the last almost 60 year living across the United States. Most recently in Oregon where she was ordained in 2016 before moving to Atlanta in 20021, then onto Wilmington when called to be the priest at Holy Cross Episcopal Church of Myrtle Grove (Monkey Junction area).
Anne has a passion for walking alongside others on their spiritual journey as a Spiritual Director and offer a welcoming sacred space for exploring how God is revealed to us through the liturgy, in creation, and in conversations. She also brings to ministry an understanding of the hurt experienced by discrimination and the need for inclusion for all after growing up in the Apartheid Era as a daughter of a missionary/priest and mother who was a nurse. Anne is a lifelong Anglican/Episcopalian.
Anne received her Masters of Divinity from Sewanee: The University of the South’s School of Theology in 2016, a Masters of Education in Therapeutic Recreation from University of Georgia, Bachelor’s of Science Degree in Recreation Therapy from Missouri State University, and a Liberal Arts Degree from Cottey College. For most of her professional career Anne has worked in the mental health field as either a Recreation Therapist, Mental Health Professional or as an Addiction Counselor.
Anne is married to Stacy Collins and they have one cat (Little Bit) and dog (Logan). Anne says, “We love the outdoors and being around water. Wilmington suits us “just fine!”
Rev Paula Zabkar, Treasurer
Paula is a passionate teacher and inspiring speaker. She believes in using ancient and contemporary wisdom as a guide to living spiritually in present life circumstances. Her highest prayer is to inspire you to live an extraordinary life!
Paula started Spiritual Soul Center in July 2017. After barely getting off the ground, the pandemic happened and everything shifted. A small, dedicated group guided Soul Center through almost two years of virtual ministry. We emerged in January of 2022 with passion and possibility. In August of that same year we moved into our new home with Pastor Meg McBride at Hope Recovery on Winston Boulevard.
We have grown from a small but might thirty-five members in August of 2022 to 130 members in August 2024. Our mission is this: We are here to create a movement grounded in love and kindness that transforms us, our community, and the world. We are guided by these three words: Grow, Serve, Transform.
Paula has a Bachelor’s Degree in Metaphysical Science and Ordination from the University of Metaphysics, Sedona, Arizona, is a Licensed Unity Teacher and Life Coach.
Rev Kelley Wheat-Rivers, Social Media
Rev. Kelley Wheat-Rivers (she/her) is a local Wilmingtonian. She received BA degrees in Christian Education and Youth Ministry from Pfeiffer University, near Charlotte, NC. She and her spouse then moved to California where she earned a masters degree in Pastoral Care and Counseling from Claremont School of Theology. After being a full time hospice and hospital chaplain for 16 years, she is now the Associate Minister at the Unitarian Universalist Congregation of Wilmington. Being Unitarian Universalist, interfaith collegiality is a high priority for her. Kelley also loves to sing, make art, read, crochet, do archery, and kayak. She and her spouse celebrated their 20th wedding anniversary earlier in 2024. They have a wonderful kiddo together, who keeps them on their toes! Any additional spare time is spent with family and friends, taking photos and making memories.